Q: I recently stumbled on an Instagram account of a young woman who’s a “knife play” enthusiast. I consider myself sex positive, but I must say I was disturbed by the images. I was also shocked that I didn’t know this was a thing! But of course it’s a thing, ‘cuz everything is a thing, right? I don’t want to outlaw it, and everyone has a right to their kinks, I guess, but I’m so wigged out! I guess I don’t have a question here besides wondering what you think about it. Ick! —Can’t Understand This
A: Dogs have been watching humans fuck for 30,000 years. So long as your pup is a passive observer and not (ick) an active participant, he’ll be fine and you won’t go to jail.
A: No, SBFDBG, you can’t. Your mom isn’t around to defend herself and, absent proof of the affair, your dad will think it’s a spiteful (and incredibly) hurtful lie. And even if you had proof, SBFDBG, telling your father about your mother’s affair would be an act of grotesque cruelty. You have every right to be angry—your dad is being an asshole—but poisoning his memories of his marriage isn’t a proportionate response to his assholery. Instead, tell your dad your sex life is none of his business and that you refuse to discuss it with him any further. If he brings it up, hang up. Repeat as necessary.
A: If I were your wife, WISHOTK, your argument would carry the day—but I’m not your wife. Your wife is your wife, and she gave spanking a try, found it degrading in a nonsexy way, and doesn’t want to do it again. And that’s the not-the-least-bit-pink end of it. Being treated with respect by our romantic partners—literally the bare-ass minimum—doesn’t obligate us to indulge our partners in sex acts we find unpleasant, degrading, or disgusting. So you’ll have to settle for that otherwise fantastic sex life. v
