Q: I can’t believe this is why I’m finally writing you. My husband is using Pokémon Go as an excuse to stay out until 5 AM with another woman. She is beautiful and about a decade younger than him, and he won’t hear me out on why this is bothersome. Our work schedules don’t match up, and he always wants me to meet him in the wee hours of the morning after I’ve worked a full day shift and done all the work looking after our pets. I can give him the benefit of the doubt and be totally fine with him wanting to stay out after work for a few drinks with friends, even though I’m too tired to join them, but Pokémon Go until 5 AM alone with a twentysomething for four straight weeks?! It’s driving me crazy. I told him how I feel, and he says it’s my fault for “never wanting to do anything.” (I don’t consider walking around staring at a phone “doing something.”) I told him I feel like he doesn’t even like me anymore, and he didn’t even acknowledge my feelings with a response. With the craze this has become, we can’t be the only couple with this problem. I don’t think me enabling his actions by joining the game is the answer, but I’d be absolutely gutted if this game was the straw that broke up our ten-year relationship. Please help. —Pokémon Go Means No
Let him have his ridiculous obsessions—with this game, with this girl—and when he comes to his senses and abandons Pokémon Go, just like people came to their senses and walked away from Second Life a decade ago, you’ll be in a better position to decide whether you want to leave him.
You used your words, USA!USA!, and this dude violated your clearly communicated wants, needs, and limits. I’m glad you let them know you were upset and why you weren’t going to see them again. Single women who want to hook up with married couples are hard to come by and in—that’s why you’re called unicorns—and his selfish disregard for your limits, his clear violation of your trust, cost them a unicorn.
