Q: I’m a cis bi guy in my 40s who doesn’t have a lot of experience with other men. I’m happily married to a wonderful woman who knows I’m bi, and while we’re presently monogamous, we’ve talked about opening things up. If that happens, I’d like to casually hook up with a guy once in a while, but I’m a little anxious about gay hookup culture.
4. Is the “top shortage” I’ve read about a few times a real thing? Are a lot of guys strictly tops or bottoms?
4. Not all gay and bi men are into anal sex or into anal sex with casual partners, WANNABI, and while most of the men I’ve encountered—most of the men encountered the shit out of—were functionally versatile, there do seem to be more bottoms out there than tops. Not that “bottom” and “top” are static identities; a guy who’ll bottom for you might be more comfortable topping for someone else, a guy who enjoys bottoming when he’s younger might enjoy topping more later in life and vice versa, etc.
2. The close friends I’ve told this to think I’m broken and or nuts. I think I’m fine. I can’t explain why this is what I want but I know it feels right. Am I nuts? Am I broken? —Down To Fuck Or Marry But Not Both
